Joe's blog

TRON: LEGACY (movie review)

2010-12-21T13:34:00.005-06:00

Tron Legacy

Review written by: Joe Yang
Made in: USA
Language: English
Director: Joseph Koskinski
Starring: Jeff Bridges, Garrett Hedlund, Olivia Wilde, Bruce Boxleitner, Michael Sheen, Beau Garrett
Year: 2010

Synopsis: After the events of the original Tron movie, genius software engineer Kevin Flynn (Jeff Bridges) becomes the CEO of mega-company Encom. Then one day in 1989, he mysteriously disappears, leaving behind a son, a corporate empire, and plenty of questions.

Over twenty years later, Flynn's son, Sam (Garrett Hedlund) has grown to become just as brilliant as his father. Although well-meaning, he's essentially directionless in life and shows no desire to take control of Kevin's company. He's a bit of a computer prankster, and has regular encounters with the law.

Encom seems to be slipping back into its old ways, with another software expert named Ed Dillinger Jr (Cillian Murphy) poised to become its next rising star. (Dillinger, if you care to remember, is the son of Edward Dillinger Sr, the villain from the first film).

Then one day, Alan Bradley (Bruce Boxleitner), creator of the original Tron character and one of Flynn's closest friends (as well as an Encom board member), gets a mysterious page from Flynn's old office. The funny thing is that the number has been disconnected for over two decades.

When Sam decides to investigate, he winds up getting transported to The Grid, a computer world created by his father. It loosely resembles the neon-highlighted world from the firstTron movie, only this one is much darker, scarier, and looks more like Las Vegas (only the showgirls and hookers there can kill you in more creative ways).

Intended to be a place of infinite possibilities and wonder, The Grid has instead become a hellish, dystopian deathtrap full of machines and weirdos. The whole place is under the dictatorial reign of a malevolent individual known as CLU (also played by Jeff Bridges).

CLU was a program designed by Kevin Flynn who was originally intended to help create The Grid. But instead of making The Grid into the Digital Land of Happy, CLU turned against Flynn, created an evil empire, and forced his maker into hiding without any means of returning to the real world. So Kevin lives as a hermit in a secret hideout, and with each passing day, begins to look more and more like "The Dude" from The Big Lebowski.

Reunited with Sam, Flynn finds he must act in order to stop CLU. The best way to do so is from our world, where the entire Grid can simply be deleted by double-clicking "Empty Trash." But the only way out of the computer world is through an exit portal (that was opened when Sam arrived), which will close in a matter of hours.

Aided by Kevin Flynn's apprentice, a highly advanced (and really hot) female program named Quorra (Olivia Wilde), our heroes decide to make a mad dash for it. But the stakes increase even more once they discover that the megalomaniacal CLU has found a way to enter ourworld, with plans to remake it in his image...

The Good: Tron Legacy is a very entertaining thrill ride with amazing visuals and heart-pounding action set pieces. The electronic music duo Daft Punk provides a very fitting (and cool) soundtrack, and even have a brief cameo in the film.

For fans of the original, Tron Legacy contains a number of references and parallels (in terms of thematic content, lines of dialogue, visuals, etc.) which proves that the filmmakers did their research and put forth a sincere effort to make sci-fi geeks like me happy.

Although more hard-edged and intense than its predecessor, Tron Legacy is not an overdone, garishly "in-your-face" production that assaults your senses. The computer graphics and updated CG are gorgeous to look at, and the art direction is superb.

Tron Legacy also doesn't hit you over head to remind you that things have changed since the 80s, and the film never gets bogged down with trying to cram in all the contemporary computer terms and jargon that surround us in the modern age. There's barely any mention of the internet, and thankfully no obvious jokes about Mac vs PC. It's a very story-driven movie that avoids going off on boring tangents (which could have easily happened).

And of course, it was great to see Jeff Bridges and Bruce Boxleitner reprise their respective roles after twenty-eight years.

The Bad: As focused and story-driven as it is, I will say that Tron Legacy does eschew character development in favor of moving things along. For me, it's a minor thing, but it would have been nicer to have seen a little more drama happening between all the protagonists.

The secondary characters, played by Olivia Wilde and Bruce Boxleitner, could have been utilized a bit more. Cillian Murphy's surprise role as Ed Dillinger Jr could have added more to the story as well. Some of the dialogue is stilted and awkward, and I thought Jeff Bridges could have let loose and cracked just a few more jokes.

The final action sequence is very creative but a bit too long, and a few of the others get a little confusing in places.

But my biggest complaint is near the end with the Tron character himself (I won't spoil it here). And the movie's denouement is too brief. If a third sequel ever gets made, hopefully my questions will be answered. We'll see.

Who would like this movie: First and foremost, Tron Legacy will mean more to you if you're a fan of the original. But even if you haven't seen the 1982 version, this one has enough entertainment value to stand alone. It's not perfect, but as a long-awaited sequel to a cult movie, it delivers. The story is coherent, the visuals are beautiful, and Daft Punk's music score is pretty cool. Overall, it's a lot of fun.

(3 out of 4 stars)

Foreign film review: Ivan Vassilyevich Changes Occupation (Иван Васильевич меняет профессию)

2010-12-11T12:26:00.002-06:00

Ivan Vassilyevich Changes Occupation

(Иван Васильевич меняет профессию)

Made in: Former Soviet Union
Language: Russian
Director: Leonid Gaidai
Starring: Yuri Yakovlev, Aleksandr Demyanenko, Leonid Kuravlev, Saveliy Kramarov, Natalia Selezneva, Natalia Krachkovskaya, Vladimir Etush
Year: 1973

Review written by: Joe Yang

Synopsis: Shurik (Aleksandr Demyanenko) is a brilliant, absent-minded scientist who has built an amazingly goofy-looking time machine in his Moscow apartment. While conducting tests, he's blown the fuses in the entire building, much to the chagrin of the uptight, bureacratic superintendent, Ivan Vassilyevich Bunsha (Yuri Yakovlev).

Ignoring Bunsha's routine warnings, and barely reacting when his cheating wife Zina (Natalia Selezneva) decides to leave him, Shurik eventually gets his amazing invention to work. As a result, he accidentally transports Bunsha and a small-time thief, George Miloslavsky (Leonid Kuravlev), back in time several hundred years.

Walking through a time rift, Bunsha and George find themselves inside the private chamber of Ivan the Terrible (also played by Yuri Yakovlev). The historic Tsar, terrified at the arrival of the two, inadvertently runs through the rift into modern day Moscow.

Forced to disguise themselves, Bunsha dresses up as Ivan IV (to whom he coincidentally bears an odd resemblance) while Miloslavsky passes himself off as a prince (who incidentally has the same name as an historical figure who was executed by the Tsar).

Meanwhile, the real Ivan the Terrible must temporarily adjust to modern life in Moscow while Shurik frantically works to get his time machine working again after it is nearly destroyed by a badly aimed battle axe.

The Good: Although incredibly cheesy, Ivan Vassilyevich Changes Occupation is a very good natured, well-acted, and well-directed film. The actors are superb, the characters are all distinct and meaningful, and director Leonid Gaidai makes use of some pretty impressive camera work. The story is utterly ridiculous, but it's very well focused and develops at a good pace.

Yuri Yakovlev does a very convincing job of playing two roles and is a lot of fun to watch. And Aleksandr Demyanenko is very likable as the absent-minded Shurik. The music is hilariously catchy, there's a lot of intelligent humor despite the underlying silliness, and there's a boldness to the whole production that makes the movie fun.

The look of the film is more 60's than 70s, and if I didn't know better, this could have passed as a retro-looking comedy made in the modern age (in an Austin Powers sort of way). I wouldn't be surprised if Ivan Vassilyevich Changes Occupation becomes a cult favorite among movie fans (if it hasn't already).

The comedy works so well because, first and foremost, the story is coherent. There isn't any silliness just for silliness sake. Every sight gag, joke, and scene serves a specific purpose. And what makes the film so funny is that none of the characters find their situation laughable (even if the viewer does).

The Bad: The ending was satisfying, but I thought it could have been a little better. I won't give it away, but it came close to being an "oh, it was just a dream" cop-out.

Who would like this movie: Ivan Vassilyevich Changes Occupation is for you if you like foreign films, cheesy stuff from the 60s and 70s, and Russian cinema. Many of the jokes are based off of Russian history (particularly the time or Ivan the Terrible), so it'll be helpful to do a little studying so you'll get them. A good number of jokes are also language-based, so those who don't know Russian might not laugh as hard as those who do.

And of course, some of the songs are great (in an incredibly cheesy way that could have only existed in the 60s and 70s).

It's too bad I never saw this back while I was in film school. Neither my undergraduate nor graduate programs ever explored this side of Russian cinema, and looking back, it's kind of a disappointment. Introducing films like this to students will help dispel a lot of stereotypes about Russian filmmaking.

Instead of forcing undergrads to sit through Eisenstein's Battleship Potemkin several times a semester, it might be useful to let them know that, like anyone else, the Russians have a pretty good sense of humor too.

(3 out of 4 stars)

Horror movie review: Dead Snow

2010-11-20T03:21:00.003-06:00

DEAD SNOW (Død Snø)

Made in: Norway
Language: Norwegian
Director: Tommy Wirkola
Starring: Charlotte Frogner, Vegar Hoel, Lasse Valdal, Stig Frode, Jeppe Laursen, Evy Kasseth Røsten, Jenny Skavlan, Ørjan Garnst, Bjørn Sundquist, Ane Dahl Torp
Year: 2009

Review written by: Joe Yang

Originally published at: www.foreign-films-for-you.com/dead-snow.html

Synopsis: Seven med school students on Easter Vacation arrive at a cozy cabin near the region of Øksfjord. The cabin is in the middle of nowhere, there's still plenty of snow on the ground, and there's no cell phone signal (gee, I wonder what's going to happen?)

The group is led by a guy named Vegard (Lasse Valdal), whose girlfriend Sara (Ane Dahl Torp) is supposed to meet them the following day. Sara owns the cabin, but instead of driving with the rest of them, she has decided to ski through the region instead...on her own...at night (gee, I wonder what'll happen to her?)

That evening, an old, grizzled hiker (Bjørn Sundquist) happens upon the cabin and warns them about the region's dark history. During the Second World War, a group of Nazis occupied the area and terrorized the local populace.

Near the end of the War, as the Russians advanced, the Nazis began plundering the towns for any valuables (gold, jewels, etc) they could get their hands on. They were driven from Øksfjord by the citizens, and fled into the woods where they presumably froze to death.

The hiker leaves, and the horny youths pretty much dismiss his ghastly tale. However, the old man was telling the truth! Before long, the group finds themselves confronted by a horde of Nazi zombies. Decapitations, mutilations, and disembowelments ensue!

Think Black Friday at Wal-Mart only with more chainsaws and Norwegian expletives.

Remarks: Dead Snow tries way too hard to be a campy cult classic. It contains just about every horror movie cliché you can think of, and attempts to cover for itself by dropping a few half-hearted self-referential jokes.

Director Tommy Wirkola obviously drew inspirations from movies such as Shaun of the Dead and Sam Raimi's Evil Dead series, and the end result is an often sloppy mess that feels embarrassingly adolescent.

Are there blood and guts? Yes. Literally. But beyond that, there isn't much else. Even the customary sex scene isn't all that interesting. I get that Dead Snow isn't meant to be taken seriously, but throwing in loads of cheesy, over-the-top gore that's just supposed to make you squirm doesn't work if that's all there is to the script.

The characters aren't all that memorable, and the plot is flawed. Again, I understand that a movie involving Nazi zombies who want to eat sexually frustrated Norwegians probably doesn't lend itself to much intellectual discourse. But within the realm of the story itself, no matter how ridiculous, there needs to be some sense of logic.

For example, we're never told how the German soldiers became zombies in the first place. And we don't know really get to know any of the characters enough to care about what happens to them.

The actors play their roles enthusiastically and some of the cinematography is quite beautiful in places. Some of the sight gags are creative, but most of the jokes fall flat. Not even the obligatory chainsaw can liven things up.

The editing is awkward, the dialogue is pretty lame, and even though Dead Snow is just under ninety minutes, most of it is actually pretty boring.

Who would like this movie: Dead Snow seems geared towards those who like over-the-top, campy, disgusting horror movies. However, I wouldn't recommend this one because it doesn't add anything new to the zombie (or horror) genre.

I'll admit that there were enough elements in the film that could have made it into a pretty interesting tale. Unfortunately, Tommy Wirkola didn't capitalize on them and went for a few extra disembowelments instead.

Overall, this is pretty much a waste of time, and the c'mon, it's supposed to be a bad movie excuse won't fly.

Horror Movie Review: Shiver (Eskalofrío)

2009-06-26T10:05:00.004-05:00

Shiver (Eskalofrío)
Made in: Spain
Language: Spanish
Director: Isidro Ortiz
Starring: Junio Valverde, Mar Sodupe, Blanca Suárez, Francesc Orella, Jimmy Barnatán, Roberto Enríquez, Paul Berrondo, Pau Poch
Year: 2008

Review written by: Joe Yang

Originally published at: Foreign-Films-For-You.com

Synopsis: Santi (Junio Valverde) is a lonely teenager living in Barcelona with his mom, Julia (Mar Sodupe). He suffers from a condition called Photophobia, where he's hypersensitive to sunlight. As a result, he can't really do much during the day.

Other kids his age think he's a freak, his father, Oscar (Paul Berrondo), is a compulsive gambler, and his best friend Leo (Jimmy Barantán) is a pop culture geek who's as much of an outcast as he is.

At the advice of his doctor, Santi and his mother relocate to a remote village in the north, where the days are known for being short. The house they find is a little rustic, but it has all the necessary amenities for modern life.

But as in most horror movies, it comes complete with spooky shadows, window shutters that rattle really easily, and an attic full of stuff that belonged to the previous tenants. Yup, that's right. Nothing out of the ordinary around here...

The landlord, Dimas (Francesc Orella), seems okay, and although school isn't great, it's not as bad as it was in the big city. Santi befriends Tito (Pau Poch), a kid who's small for his age, and Ángela (Blanca Suárez), the attractive daughter of the local police inspector, Antonio (Roberto Enríquez). But before Santi can settle in, he learns that there's something strange about this quiet little town.

Something scary lives in the woods, and it's known for viciously attacking livestock. When it starts killing people, Santi just always happens to be around. Naturally, he's blamed for the deaths, or at least he's suspected of being a part of them. But as the frights escalate, Santi tries solving the mystery himself with the help of his friends. And before long, he uncovers a dark secret about the small town...

The Good: Cinematically, Shiver looks great and much credit should be given to production designer Pilar Revuelta (who worked on Pan's Labyrinth).

The story moves at a good pace, and unlike horror movies done in the US, the acting here is very good. Although the storyline isn't too different from a scary movie that you'd see Stateside, the higher caliber of acting gives the film more depth and intelligence.

The bloodshed isn't over-the-top. In fact, since many of the gory scenes take place in shadows or under shaky flashlight beams, director Isidro Ortiz leaves much of the horror to your imagination. Shiver contains plenty of solid suspense, and instead of going for cheap, jump-out-at-you scares, most of the creepiness is carefully constructed and plays more upon simple fears (being home alone, thunderstorms, lost in the woods, etc).

The Bad: Shiver doesn't make full use of all its major elements. Santi's photophobia is interesting, but it never plays out in a major way. It would have been better if, for instance, his "handicap" became a strength at certain times. If he can't come out during the day, then it's only logical to assume that he's at his best during the night. But no. Here, he's as scared of the dark (and ineffective in it) as anybody.

Tito has the potential to be an interesting character, but he sort of just disappears halfway through the story. And the love interest, Ángela, is underdeveloped as well. Without spoiling the ending, there are also some minor questions of logic that'll bother you if you think about them too much.

Who would like this movie: You should watch Shiver if you're fan of foreign films, and horror movies (particularly Spanish ones) that are focused more on scares than gore. Parts of the movie will make you think of movies such as Sleepy Hollow, Lost Boys, and maybe even the Blair Witch Project.

The overall premise is pretty familiar, but it's told very well. I suppose this counts as a teen movie in some ways, but it doesn't look cheesy nor does it insult anyone's intelligence.

There are no boob shots (which may be a disappointment to some), and since it's made in a country with no drinking age, I was mildly surprised to see that none of the main characters (or victims) got trashed. Perhaps that a cultural thing, which proves that foreign films are indeed educational.

For the most part, Shiver is an engaging thriller. It's not perfect, but it easily surpasses a lot of Hollywood stuff aimed at a similar demographic.

(3 out of 4 stars)

Cheerios...a drug?

2009-06-19T16:57:00.004-05:00

Here's something scary.

Everyone's heard of the cereal Cheerios, right? And if you pick up a box, you'll see some sort of label claiming that it's good for your heart and lowers cholesterol. I'm not sure if that's actually true or not, because personally, I don't eat Cheerios. I think it tastes like cardboard.

But the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) sent General Mills, the company that makes Cheerios, a stern letter that states: "Based on claims made on your product's label, we have determined Cheerios is promoted for conditions that cause it to be a drug because the product is intended for use in the prevention, mitigation, and treatment of disease."

I'm not joking. The federal government, in all of its infinite wisdom, wants to classify Cheerios as a drug! So if Big Brother has his way, we might not be allowed to buy healthy cereals without a doctor's prescription. And if you buy a box of Cheerios in Holland, for instance, and try to bring it back to the US, maybe the DEA will raid your home.

Some groups, such as the Center for Science in the Public Interest, actually welcome the fact that the FDA will be investigating every minute health claim made by food manufacturers....interfering with free commerce all in the name of keeping us poor, dumb consumers safe.

Now, I'm not sure if Cheerios is the miracle food that it claims to be. All I know is that if it isn't, some private, 3rd Party watchdog group will let us know. Or consumers like you and I will do our own research. In other words, the free market will ensure that word gets around if some health claim (or any product) turns out to be bogus.

Do companies that make false claims and cheat consumers deserve to lose money or go under? Absolutely! But the government shouldn't intervene unless the companies are actively hurting us. Corporations that lie about their products will be punished by the market, because we consumers, who aren't nearly as stupid as the government thinks we are, will weed them out.

And we will weed them out far more efficiently than any bloated bureaucracy ever could.

If Cheerios is classified as a drug because it's "intended for use in the prevention, mitigation, and treatment of disease," then what's stopping the government from classifying ALL healthy foods as drugs? Apples? Whole wheat bread? Orange juice? Yes, I'm being ridiculous here, but if things keep going the way they're going, who's to say if we'll end up needing prescriptions just to go grocery shopping?

Hopefully, common sense will prevail in this case and the government will leave us the hell alone.

End of May...

2009-05-31T21:52:00.003-05:00

I'm feeling better about the second draft of It Follows, but right now I'm essentially rewriting much of the story. It'll be more psychological and character-based, and even though it's a long process, I think it'll be a better book because of the changes.

My goal is to get this thing done in June. Wish me luck!

IT FOLLOWS - 1st draft complete

2009-05-11T10:29:00.004-05:00

A few days ago, I finished the first draft of my 2nd novel. Now I'm in the revision/editing stage. And as it is with most revisions I make, much of the central storyline has totally changed. So suffice it to say, the plot description of It Follows, as seen on my website, is no longer accurate. But fear not, the story is much more focused and probably works better now.

Horror Movie review: THE MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN

2009-04-13T08:46:00.005-05:00

The Midnight Meat Train
Made in: USA
Language: English
Director: Ryuhei Kitamura
Starring: Bradley Cooper, Vinnie Jones, Leslie Bibb, Brooke Shields, Barbara Eve Harris, Tony Curran, Roger Bart
Year: 2008

Review by: Joe Yang

Originally published at: Foreign-films-for-you.com

Synopsis: This movie was adapted from the short story by renown horror writer, Clive Barker, and is from Volume One of the Books of Blood collection. Leon (Bradley Cooper) is a talented, ambitious, but broke photographer who specializes in taking candid, urban street shots. With the help of his girlfriend, Maya (Leslie Bibb), he's able to meet with Susan Hoff (Brook Shields), a famous art dealer.

Although she sees promise in his work, Susan bluntly criticizes his portfolio. She points out that Leon needs to be more courageous with his photography in order to capture the true emotional essence of the "city's soul."

While in a subway station late one night, Leon photographs several thugs who are about to rough up a young woman. He manages to prevent the crime, and his intense photos, once developed, have enough grit and raw realism to impress Susan. On the brink of success, Leon just needs a few more pictures like it in order to make it big.

Leon then becomes drawn to a quiet, dour, and scary-looking subway rider named Mahogany (Vinnie Jones). Unbeknownst to Leon, Mahogany is actually a serial killer who rides the trains late at night, brutally slaying unsuspecting passengers with the help of a heavy meat hammer. After slashing or decapitating his hapless (and often annoying) victims, he strings their messy corpses up like slaughtered cattle.

Leon soon becomes obsessed with Mahogany, who may be connected to a hundred year-old mystery involving a killer known as the "Subway Butcher." This leads the photographer down a dark path as he risks life and limb to find the bloody truth.

And through it all, everyone in this movie is still considerate enough to observe the no-smoking rule on the subway.

The Good: The Midnight Meat Train has a lot of solid suspense, and a great build-up. Bradley Cooper does a good job as the photographer who becomes obsessed to the point of becoming mentally unhinged. The psychological change surrounding his character is intriguing, and the mystery behind Mahogany and his gruesome purpose will draw you in.

Director Ryuhei Kitamura often moves the camera in creative ways, and makes use of a dark, bleak-looking atmosphere that perfectly captures the mood of the film. The editing and lighting give The Midnight Meat Train sort of an "indie" look, which makes it seem a cut above the average modern slasher.

Former footballer Vinnie Jones is perfectly cast as the mysterious Subway Butcher, and Kitamura masterfully pulls the viewer along, giving us enough clues to know that there's a well thought-out plot. But at the same time, he never gives so much away that the movie becomes predictable.

The Bad: The ending. Although it all comes together in a coherent, sensible way, the story sort of wraps up a little too quickly. Truth be told, I found it really disappointing.

Who would like this movie: Take The Midnight Meat Train if you like the works of Clive Barker. I haven't read the original short story (shame on me, since I myself am a horror author), so I can't guarantee that Barker fans will like it. But it's sure to spark a reaction.

As I said, the first half of the film is excellent and much better than a by-the-numbers slasher that's content to throw blood all over the screen for the sole purpose of grossing you out. That being said, this movie has plenty of blood and cringe-inducing graphic violence to remind you that, in the end, it is indeed a horror movie. So if you enjoy watching eyeballs getting plucked out of heads or corpses getting stabbed in the genitals, then this movie's definitely for you!

But despite a great build-up and some genuine suspense, The Midnight Meat Train gets a little off-track with a so-so ending.

(2 and 1/2 stars out of 4)

What's scary these days anyway?

2009-03-24T16:47:00.002-05:00

By Joe Yang

A few years ago, when "torture porn" schlock such as the Saw and Hostel movies arrived in cinemas, people really started getting scared that the nation's youth was (yet again) headed down the path of destruction.

For a brief moment, people wondered if the initial popularity of such films was going to become a major trend. Parents to pundits, including Fox News commentator Bill O'Reilly, voiced concern over what these torture movies said about modern society. These movies, after all, were brutal. And they made millions.

But years later, the Hostel sequel and the Saw franchise haven't enjoyed the same kind of box office successes that they had when first released. Although still somewhat popular, they don't seem to pose any kind of major cultural threat.

In other words, the world didn't come to an end because of a few sick movies.

So what scares people these days? As a horror writer, who's undoubtedly also fascinated with horror movies, I wonder if there are any ideas out there that can grab people the way Tobe Hooper's original Texas Chainsaw Massacre or Hitchcock's Psycho did.

When director Wes Craven methodically deconstructed the modern horror movie with the Scream series, he exposed every laughable flaw and formulaic plot turn of most scary movies. This was fun for a while, but seems to have had unintended consequences for later horror movies.

Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees have practically become caricatures of themselves. Aliens and Predators have made more of a mess out of their reputations than Democrats and Republicans. Edgar Wright's Shaun of the Dead took the scariness out of zombies (albeit brilliantly), and now it seems that all we're left with are remakes. Sure, an original killer is created every now and then, but when's the last time a slasher's name carried the same weight as Freddy or Jason?

And with the rise of ultra-realistic video games on advanced game consoles, it looks like the horror film industry only has more to compete with.

However, I remain optimistic. Horror is an element of popular culture that will always be in demand. The basic instinct to purge our deepest psychological fears is as necessary as breathing. So what will they think of next? I have no idea.

But believe me, it's coming...

New Short Stories

2009-03-08T21:48:00.005-05:00

I've posted 2 new short horror stories at my website. You can find them here .

They'll give you a good idea of what my writing style is like, so please have a look (unless you're too scared).

More stories will be posted as soon as I finish writing them. Enjoy!

I like horror, not extreme violence

2009-03-06T18:54:00.003-06:00

By: Joe Yang

Every time I tell someone that I write horror stories, very often they assume that I must like watching horror movies too. The reasoning seems logical. I write "scary" stuff, therefore I must always be the first one in line whenever a new Saw movie comes out, right?

Wrong.

I'm not sure how it is with other horror writers, but for me, horror isn't actually my favorite cinematic genre (comedy is). That isn't to say that I avoid horror flicks altogether. For instance, Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho is one of my all-time favorite scary movies. Tobe Hooper's The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (the original, not the terrible remake) was a brilliantly made psychological horror movie, in that there was very little (if any) gore but plenty of frightful stuff left to the imagination. Night of the Living Dead captured the nihilism and emotional despair of the Cold War 60s, and the recent Spanish film, The Orphanage (El Orfanato), is not only a great ghost story, but a moving drama as well.

Whenever I find myself talking about horror, I inevitably get into a discussion about movies containing extreme violence. Or "torture porn," as it is better known (what an overused term). I have not, and absolutely have no interest in seeing movies such as Wolf Creek, Saw, Hostel, or Barney vs. The Teletubbies.

But at the same time, I'm not going to rant about how depraved society is becoming, and that the movies mentioned above will breed a generation of desensitized Columbine copycats. The films of Eli Roth and his oft-criticized compatriots simply aren't my cup of tea, and I'll leave it at that. And for one, I don't think movies like Saw or Hostel will bring about the end of civilization as we know it.

After all, people thought that Elvis' swinging hips, the Beatles, and shows like The Simpsons were going to spell doom for the children of tomorrow. But did they? Hmmm. Let's see. Today, Elvis' songs are innocent, the Beatles were actually pretty well-dressed (in their early days, at least), and The Simpsons is now arguably one of the cleaner shows on TV.

So no. I don't think the fleeting popularity of "torture porn" movies is evidence that the world is going to hell in a Happy Meal. In my opinion, it's pointless shock value (but I can't say for sure since I haven't actually seen those movies). The controversy and hype will draw a lot of curious viewers. But like pinball machines, the new Volkswagen Beetle, and MC Hammer, it's probably just a fad until the next big thing comes around. And I'm almost certain that civilization, and all the iPods included therein, will still be intact when it does.

So just what kind of horror do I like, if you must know?

First off, I like the kind of horror story (a book and/or movie) that actually has a coherent storyline. Secondly, I like a horror movie that has some sort of purpose beyond the story being told. This can include, but is not limited to, social/political commentary, satire, the exploration of personal or collective fears, and why we shouldn't build giant robots that can't be controlled.

To me, a horror story that scares the piss out of you without being in-your-face graphic is always a winner.

The horror of 80's videogames...

2009-02-17T15:37:00.002-06:00

by: Joe Yang

With scary games such as House of the Dead, Resident Evil 5 (or 6, or whatever number they're up to these days), you practically participate in a horror movie where you get to control the outcome of the story.

With sophisticated game platforms such as XBOX 360, Playstation 3, and the Wii, computer generated gore has never looked more realistic. With the help of a game console or PC, you can almost experience the life of a mass murderer without the inconvenience of getting shot by the police, going to court, or dealing with the media.

That's today.

But what about the videogames of yesterday? Sure, those cute graphics, beeps, and boops seemed so innocent and harmless. But were they? Let's examine a few favorites, and before long you'll discover a darker side lurking underneath all of them. You see, I believe the next videogame-to-horror movie shouldn't be made from the likes of modern favorites such as Resident Evil or Silent Hill. Try this:

PACMAN: An old favorite. A yellow circle goes around eating a bunch of dots while being chased by a group of multicolored ghosts.

Why it's terrifying: The enemies are ghosts. Ghosts can't be stopped, because you can't kill what's already dead. The best Pacman can do is slow them down temporarily after he's taken one of those power pills. The game just goes on, and on, and on. It gets harder and the pills become less effective as you progress. A never-ending quest, unstoppable enemies, and drug use...sounds like a pretty dark premise if you ask me.

Who would direct if it's made into a movie: George Romero or Stanley Kubrick (if he were still alive).

DIG DUG: Here, the main character's job is to eradicate a group of critters that are goofing about underground. Yes, they're a nuisance. And yes, some of them breathe fire and are dangerous.

Why it's terrifying: All the hero has to do is go down there with a gun, and the problem can be solved in a timely, humane manner. But no! Not only does Dig-Dug, or whatever the hell his name is, NOT use a gun.

He goes down there with an air pump, methodically tracks the creatures down one by one, and when he finds them, begins inflating them full of air. Then Dug watches as the animals literally explode! Somewhere, Charles Manson and Ted Bundy are slapping their foreheads for not thinking of that first.

Who should direct if it's made into a movie: Paul Verhoeven or maybe Wes Craven

MR. DOO'S CASTLE: Little girls love unicorns. And even as guys, we associated unicorns with things that were good because some princess with an impressive rack was always riding one. Mr Doo's Castle threw me for a loop when I saw it in the arcade for the first time, because on the side of the game machine, there were these pictures of cute little red unicorns running around.

Then I realized the unicorns were bad.

The story is simple: Mr. Doo is a guy running for his life from a horde of rampaging unicorns that are bent on impaling, goring, or otherwise trampling him to death for reasons unknown.

Why it's terrifying: Mr. Doo, who also doesn't own a gun, never thinks to leave his castle to call animal control or the police.

Instead, he dresses up like a clown and picks up a giant mallet. As he's being pursued, he knocks out sections of the castle floor (that are all conveniently shaped like blocks). Whenever a unicorn gets stuck in a gap where a block has been knocked out, Mr. Doo has to quickly get to the level above.

The strategy is to whack out the block hanging directly above the trapped unicorn. The falling block then falls on the offending unicorn, killing it on impact. You pass the level once you've helped Mr. Doo massacre all the animals.

Who should direct if it's made into a movie: Rob Zombie. And I think Jason Statham would make a good Mr. Doo.

There are many more games out there to comment on, but the point is clear. "Simple" 80's videogames leave plenty of room for more in-depth storytelling, and their violent premises should satisfy the sickest gorehound among us...

My kind of scary

2009-02-11T20:17:00.004-06:00

When I tell people that I write horror, instead of doing some real job like working in a cubicle or doing stuff in a lab, they always give me this odd look. Then they probably start wondering if I have a secret room in my place where I carve up dinner guests and serve them to chipmunks and hungry college kids. I don't, in case you were wondering (there's no room for one of those in my apartment).

When we think of horror fiction (or horror writers), we generally think of blood and guts, socially inept geeks who collect porn and comic books, and stressed-out individuals who are one step away from taking a power saw to someone they don't like. The first two are seldom true of horror writers, while the third applies to more people in the general population than you might realize.

No, horror writers aren't much different from you or the crazy people we distance ourselves from. Maybe we just think about it more.

Blood and guts. No, that isn't what horror writers are obsessed with. At least I'm not. Speaking for myself (and this is may be true of most horror writers), I do have a tendency to think about scary stuff a lot. Not stuff like ghosts and axe murderers, but things that could go wrong at any moment. Things like job security, freak accidents, and what we'd do if the people you once trusted turned out to be hiding something really sinister.

Or what about stuff that you're supposed to believe is good? Like hybrid cars, for instance. Yeah, they get great mileage, but has anyone thought about what to do with the highly toxic (and environmentally unfriendly) battery that powers that thing when it comes time to junk the Prius for a new one? You can't just toss it in the garbage can and let the city handle it, you know.

Hey, I'm all about green energy. But let's think it through before we jump on every green bandwagon that comes along. Remember, zombies are green too. And maybe there's a good reason why...

Website is up

2009-02-08T00:17:00.002-06:00

Well, after talking about it for so long, I finally got around to putting together a website for my writing. It can be found here.

Of course, more stuff will be added to it as time goes on. Indie writing is a lot of fun, but it's a heck of a lot of work. I wrote another 1500 or so words this morning (for my next novel), and tomorrow I'll be adding at least another 1000.

I'm still feeling my way through the whole self-publishing bit, and the marketing aspect of it seems so overwhelming. There's so much information out there, and so much to learn.

Now that I'm starting to immerse myself more and more into writing, it seems as if I've stumbled upon an exciting time. The nature of publishing, thanks to the rise of digital technology and the web, seems to be changing. Self-publishing is losing its stigma, as the business model of "conventional" publishing company proves to be less cost effective.

There goes a notion that self-publishing (where anyone can become a published author) will lead to a flood of poor-quality books. I strongly disagree. First of all, the discipline and drive to undertake a task as daunting as writing a book will weed out the lazy and unmotivated. And secondly, the free market will largely determine which books are "good" and which ones stink. Self-publishing, or indie writing, is gearing up to be a much more democratic way for new talent to get noticed.

But whether one chooses to be self-published or plans to go the conventional route of finding an agent, and enduring rejection letters, the passion for writing will always be at the core of any success. As a writer, do you love what you do?

Progress & other stuff

2009-02-03T09:58:00.000-06:00

Since the end of January, I'm pleased to have hammered out several thousand more words, and feel that the new novel is going well. Novel writing is tough, but fun. I can't wait until this thing is done.

The website progress continues- I've started designing the multimedia page, and still have a bunch of decisions to make with that.

More to come...

Progress on new book, and other stuff

2009-01-23T17:02:00.001-06:00

I finished another 1,000 words yesterday, and another 1,000 the day before. It Follows is coming along but it's going to quite a task to get it done. I intend to complete it within the next few months, though.

I'm also building the web page for my writing. I just started putting the "Multimedia" page together, and will be scripting a little video for it soon. Of course, I'll let you know once the website goes live.

Those Things will be available again online once the cover gets revised. The original version was a wee bit dark but the company seems to have sorted the issue out.

Stay tuned for more!

Progress on latest project

2009-01-21T01:17:00.000-06:00

Novel writing is tough, but I'm loving it (so far). I hear it's good advice to write 1,000 words a day. Today I did manage to meet my daily quota, which was good. The official Joe Yang website is still under construction, and I'll let you know when it launches.

I also hosted/DJ'd the weekly Salsa/Tango party in downtown Madison- great turnout tonight! Fun crowd, lots of good dancing too.